Saturday, October 20, 2007

So Who Supports the Troops from Green Lantern Corps?

History, I believe, furnishes no example of a priest-ridden people maintaining a free civil government. This marks the lowest grade of ignorance of which their civil as well as religious leaders will always avail themselves for their own purposes.

-Thomas Jefferson (Letter to von Humboldt, 1813)

And as the Democratic candidates fight over which one is the most pious, the Republican Party continues to make this God superhero a major part of their party platform.

Or so says Factbox from Reuters:

"The leading Republican candidates in the White House race will try to woo religious social conservatives on Friday and Saturday at a "Values Voter Summit" organized by the Family Research Council, a right-wing lobby group with strong evangelical ties.

"Religion will play a major role in the 2008 presidential election in the United States, where church attendance rates and other indicators of faith are much higher than elsewhere in the developed world."

So here's the tally for the GOP:

Rudy Giuliani- Roman Catholic
Mitt Romney- Mormon
Fred Thompson- Church of Christ
John McCain- Southern Baptist
Mike Huckabee- Southern Baptist
(Ron Paul appears to missing from the tally)

Notice that not a single one of them has declared their support for a single one of earth's Green Lanterns, let alone all of them in their fight for justice against the evil Sinestro Corps.

Why is this? Why is it that our candidates can openly discuss their relationship with a superhero from the Bible who has yet to apply for affiliation with the Justice League of America or at least attempted to get into Starfleet Academy while ignoring the daily threats we face from the Legion of Doom and the dastardly villains rallying around Sinestro? These are real questions that we need to be asking all of the presidential hopefuls.

A future president must become aware of the mind beams being directed into our brains that make us all do bad things. They must endorse and join the battle against all things evil. Even a nod towards Superman or the Island of Themyscira would be helpful. But no, our fate appears to be in the hands of Lex Luthor, Darkseid, Gorilla Grodd, and Sinestro. May Batman have mercy upon us for such indiscretions.

I've made up my mind right now. I'm not supporting a single candidate who hasn't declared which of the earth's Green Lanterns is best suited to defend Sector 2814 from all sorts of evil, meteors of fire, and hostile aliens. You make up your own mind, but be careful- there's always one more cell in Arkham Asylum waiting for an occupant. One of them may have your name written on it.


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