Friends, it's the Reverend Elvis D. here and I like to talk to you about something very serious: Marijuana.
I have seen and heard people talk about decriminalizing this deadly drug which kills millions of people everyday and I ask myself, "have these people gone insane?" Legalize this plant and next thing you know teenagers everywhere will be lying around on their couches, chilling out, and listening to Bob Marley. I can't imagine anything more dangerous for a society.
There are several reasons why these lunatics think this poisonous weed should be allowed.
1) It could be used as an energy source. With oil being as plentiful and cheap as it is now, why the hell would anybody being thinking about alternative fuel sources? Damn.
2) It could be used for things like paper and it is easier to replace than trees. This is a really lame argument, it isn't like we need trees to breath or anything. These people need to get a grip.
3) It has medicinal purposes and can be used to treat chronic pain. I guess Vicoden and Oxycontin ain't good enough for some people anymore. Do you think Batgirl had access to medical marijuana when the Joker shot her in the spine and leaving her crippled? No.
And look, if we decriminalized pot, there wouldn't be as much need to blow our tax dollars on prisons and more cops and in this time of great peril that would be a serious travesty.
It may be an innocent looking plant to average person, but make no mistake; marijuana is the weed with the roots that lead to the Legion of Doom's headquarters.