Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Sad State of the Economy

For the past few months, people from our flock have been saying:

"Reverend D, we know that your knowledge surpasses that of most mortals and that every word which flows from your mouth is blessed with the unquestionable and absolute Truth. Can you tell us why the American economy is in such shambles? Why have the Justice League and Starfleet Command forsaken us?"

The JLA and Starfleet Command do love us. But when we took Batman's name out of our textbooks and His picture off the classroom walls, kids started thinking it was OK to dress up like clowns and terrorize cities with dangerous toys. We lost our moral base and now we're paying the price.

However, I think the biggest problem we face is all these greedy workers who expect to get paid for their work. They're so selfish they demand things like five minute breaks and a lunch. They foolishly think they're entitled to a few days off throughout year and refuse 36 hour shifts like all good workers should. If they can't make it thirty six hours then they need to just fall asleep and fall over into the vat and die so someone else can have a job. Take the Jem'Hadar, the most feared soldiers in the Dominion. They don't require sleep or food or breaks. Plus, they die on command without wasting time asking the boss stupid questions.

We need to stay competitive if we're going to survive. The sooner we institute 36 to 48 hour shifts, get rid of minimum wage, and gut all safety regulations, the sooner our economy will recover. We need big, fat, rich white guys to suck up all the nation's wealth and unless that happens we all lose.