Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Missing from the Debates

People are always asking me, "Reverend D., can you prove to us that our nation is controlled by Borg automatons as you're always telling us?" And they ask it with sincerity as if I have to prove anything to heathens, heretics, and non-believers. I obtain my knowledge through Elders who obtain their knowledge through the Five Pillars of Star Trek and then I administer that knowledge to those who seek to have their thirst for Truth quenched.

But if non-believers insist on proof that everything taught to us by the Prophet Gene Roddenberry is the literal Truth then I will point those people in the direction of the metric system; or the lack thereof here in the United States.

Let's look at the metric system. Here is a system that is easy to understand and calculate. It's based on a set of tens. A kilometer is 1000 meters, a centimeter is 1/100 of a meter, and a milliliter is 1000th af a liter. It's simple and it's easy. Most importantly it's what is used in the only running television show that tried to teach you about the mysteries of life and how you need to live it almost every week from 1966 to 1969 and from 1987 to 2005. Yes, when Captain Picard spoke of distances, He spoke of kilometers.

But what do we have here in the US? We have the customary system. Instead of using the meter and its principles of tens, we use the size of some old king's foot as a standard of measurement. Then we have the inch which is one twelfth of a foot, a yard equaling three feet. Instead of something simple like kilometer to the meter, we get: 1 mile= 5,280 feet.

Now I ask you. Why in the hell would Americans be so resistant to change from this "36 inches equals a fuckin' yard" to a measurement system that actually makes some damn sense?

The answer is a four letter word and it's spelled B-O-R-G. What a better way to keep Terrans down and prevent us from knowing the Truth that comes from knowing the Federation than to boogle our minds with a system that cave people came up with when they were trying to figure out who had the biggest clubs or how much saber bear they were supposed to consume during a meal.

You never heard Captain Jean Luc Picard tell His helm to take the Enterprise 5 miles away from an imploding supernova did you. That's all the proof you need.


1 comment:

Malach the Merciless said...

Can't the Borg make McCain younger?