Sunday, June 24, 2007

The Slanted Media

I'm sure by now that everybody knows that our media is biased toward one side of the spectrum. They are biased against everything that is true in this universe and others. I'm sure that everyone also knows who this nation's media favors when it come to what should be wisdom and truth: Marvel Comics.

This slant in the media is really unnerving and it seeks to undermine everything good and holy in the world today. I ask you: is it any wonder that we face so many problems in this country when every time you turn around there's a poster of Spiderman, parents allowing their kids to dress up like the Fantastic Four, and plastic figurines of the Hulk on every display shelf in the nation?

This is not by accident, my friends. It's a conspiracy amongst the educated elite to try to persuade young minds into believing that the so-called morals of the Marvel Universe are the ones they should accept without any regard for the honest teachings of the real heroes like Batgirl, Aquaman, the Flash, Hawkgirl, and Zatanna. Within a week's time I counted how many times a Marvel hero received a reference from reporters as opposed to references made to DC heroes. The ratio was astoundingly in favor of Marvel.

Hollywood is also in on this conspiracy with the Marvel media. There were three Marvel based movies in this year alone, while DC didn't get any! It's no wonder that people lean in that direction and consistently deny the truth- the truth which never gets told by CNN, ABC News, and the like because reporters are too busy fawning over Wolverine and Captain America to let the people know what's really going on.

I tell you here today folks; this Marvel media bias is going to be our downfall. If we continue to turn our backs on the Justice League and the Justice Society, we may have no defense against the new Kid Amazo or the constant threat we face from the Sinestro Corps. Do people really think we can call on Ironman or Daredevil to defend us against Darkseid? Talk about losing all touch with reality. These same people probably believe that we can simply talk the Cheetah into giving up her evil ways just by appeasing her greedier side.

America really needs to get back to the basics. Batman is the only one who can put a stop to the Joker. No matter what the Marvel media tries to tell us, the X-Men just ain't up to the task. We must all beware of the sinister plan being sold to us through our newspapers, radio, and television. These Legion of Doom sympathizers would like nothing more than to see us all fail at the hands of the Gorilla Grodd, just so they can say that our DC heroes have let us down. That's how the Marvel media operates. They want us to think Dr. Octopus is the real threat while Lex Luthor secretly carries out another one of his evil plans.

Let us be sure then. Spiderman isn't going to make the Riddler go away just by trying to spin webs around his complicated puzzles. The sooner we all realize that, the safer we'll all be.



Scott said...

Hey, so you are into 'Trek and the Marvel superheros? What did you think of that book that was a mix of TNG and the X Men? I didn't read it, but I thought just the idea was horrible!

Elvis Drinkmo said...

I seen that in the bookstore and I think it's a terrible idea too.

Anne Johnson said...

Grow up, you whiner. Live with the fact that this is a Marvel nation, with Marvel values, and "DC" is only the city where our good politicians enact their wise Marvel policies.

We've got Captain America, and I think that says it all.

Elvis Drinkmo said...

I'm sorry Anne, but Captain America couldn't hold a flame to Wonder Woman. Sure he's got that shield, but what are we going to do if we need some arch-criminal to tell us the truth without Wonder Woman's golden lasso.

Most people know that this is a DC nation- but the Marvel media would like for the people to believe otherwise. If we got our fair share of coverage for a change, Captain America would be serving drinks at the nearest airport.